Friday, May 31, 2013

Not Fighting Fair

Not but a couple weeks ago, I lectured my 15 year old bonus about fighting fair. Last night I had to give myself that same lecture. 

I yet again took something the wrong way, still not use to the love behind words rather than spitefulness. My feelings were hurt, I felt ugly and unattractive despite losing over 100 lbs. I lashed out at the one person I wouldn't ever want to purposely hurt. 

We all do it, lash out at our kids being ugly. They lash out at us out of hurt or misunderstanding. Doesn't make it right, and it hurts all the same. We look at that person like they were the last person we ever expected to hurt us with words. 

I've asked for forgiveness; from him, myself but most importantly prayed to God for forgiveness. Also to humble my heart to the love given to me, that I take it as intended. That my love could continue to love me despite my short comings just like God loves me. 

All I can do is do better, and be a better example. I still screw up just like every one else, we never stop learning. Don't beat yourself up, live the forgiveness to yourself that you ask of others.